| Interview with the Love, honour and obey cast
C=Chris Evans - the host of the show. J=Jude Law. S=Sadie
Frost. Jo=Jonny. Se=Sean Pertwee. R=Rhys Ifans
C: So before we start on Love, Honour and Obey, you
go to America this evening?
J: Yeah.
S: Supposedly.
C: A lot of people know, but please tell us, why are
you going there?
S: Dunno. Why are we going?
J: Just to see some friends. There's a bit of a do going
on.
C: A bit of a do called the oscars by the way everybody.
Jude is up for an Oscar. This is an OSCAR!
Audience cheer - Jude smiles sheepishly.
C: This is not Best haircut at the smash hits awards!
This is the real deal!
J: Thank god it's not for best haircut.
C: Best supporting actor for your fabulous film (to
Jude, jokingly) What's it called again? The Talented Mr Ripley.
You're going to win you know.
J: I don't know about that. I'm not going to win - I'm going
to ogle.
C: You're going to win. Sadie, tell him he's going
to win will you.
S: (Dramatically) You're going to win *Darling*
C: Now you've been up for a Golden Globe and your against
Michael Caine.
J: That's why I'm going actually, to meet Michael Caine.
I've never met him before.
C: Really?
J: I'm going to meet Michael and Mr Cruise.
C: Tom Cruise, who's in the same category as you. That's
not bad is it? But you are going to beat them both into deep
dark hell
J: Oh I don't know about that...
Audience starts cheering and shouting 'yes'.
C: What will you say if you win?
S: You're supposed to sing me a song. That was the deal.
J: I'm going to say Thank you. That's about it. Keep it short.
C: What's the deal about the song Sadie?
S: He said one night when he was really drunk that if he
ever won an Oscar he'd sing. What was the song?
J: You're just too good to be true.
C: Lets imagine you've won it (To Sadie) Have you got
your dress sorted out?
S: I've got one from Portobello Market, a second hand one.
C: And the winner is da da da Jude Law!
Jude and Sadie camp it up, feigning shock and surprise.
S: I'll have a heart attack.
J: I think we'll just take out video cam to savour the moment.
C: Well it's on TV you know.
J: Well maybe I'll stay at home and watch it!
C: Well lets get onto this film now. You know I'm very
excited about Love, Honour & Obey. Let's see a bit of
the film. We've got lots of clips. Basically it's about the
mafia gangland in London.
J: Well its about the gangland, but its the gangland behind
the scenes.Gangland in their slippers.
C: It's not as glamorous as everybody thinks.
Clip from film of Ray Winstone doing karaoke
C: So you're part of the family. Ray Winstone's the
head of the family.
J: Really it's just about my friends who wants to be a gangster,
he's a postman, he knows my family is a gangland family, he
wants to get into the business and ray Winstone, the head
of the gangsters really just wants to be a normal bloke.
C: And your pal is Jonny Lee Miller.
J: Yeah
C: He's very good in the film.
J: He's fantastic. He's the star.
S: Actually I saw him Jogging down the thames and I waved
to him and ... I think he might be here.
C: NO WAY!
S&J: Jonny! Jonny!
Door opens to the theme from 'This is your life'. Jonny
emerges through a puff of smoke. He hugs Jude and kisses Sadie
on the cheek.
C: Jonny, You are just so good in the film, man.
Jo: Oh, thanks very much.
C: So who is your character then?
Jo: I'm a courier stroke postman.
C: And a nutter.
Jo: Yeah. I think gangsterism is going to be all exciting
and fast cars and shooters and I discover when I get into
the gang that it's not so I start a bit of trouble.
C: More fun than Trainspotting to make?
Jo: It's completely different cos we made half of it up as
we went along.
C: Do you still get called Sickboy?
Jo: Yeah, all the time yeah.
C: Are you sick of being called Sickboy, Sickboy?
Jo: Errr...Not at all.....(Searches for a witty retort
and settles for)... Chris.
Audience laugh
C: Rhys Ifans is in the film and Sean Pertwee.
Jo: Yeah. Do you like them?
C: Yeah, they're brilliant.
Jo: Well its funny you should say that cos they're actually
just outside.
C: NO WAY!
Everyone shouts for Rhys and Sean. Once again they enter
to smoke and music and everyone hugs. The small set is filling
up! No more places to sit!
C: This is unbelievable! Hey Sean, you're married!
Se: I am.
C: Sean's got married everyone!
Audience cheers wildly
C: You're great in the film.
Se: Thank you
C: I didn't know you could be so hard
Se: Well, I try.
C: At your wedding you had some very special ushers.
Se: Yeah I had him (points to Jude) and him (Points
to Jonny)
S: And me!
C: Another one. A woman dressed as a man?
Se: Oh, Kate.
C: Kate who?
Se: Kate Moss.
S: Ay! (Waves into Camera) Hi Kate!
C: And Rhys. Rhys is here.
Audience cheers. Rhys clambers to his unsteady feet and
utters his one rather drunken word - a reference to an earlier
spot in the show where you had to guess if guests were drunk
R: SKINFUL!!!!
Sean hugs him and kisses him on the head
C: Lets see another clip.
A clip of Karaoke - Jonny, Jude and other characters sing
'Avenues & Alleyways' until we reach the chorus - sung
by Ray Burdis dressed as Elvis!
C: This is such a good film and can I just say that
Ray Burdis and Dominic Anciano were both brilliant.
Se: That's weird 'cos they're both outside!
C: NO WAY!
S: They are.
Another grand entrance - Burdis is dressed as Elvis and
the audiences starts chanting 'Elvis Elvis!'
C: Were almost out of time. So Dom, Ray, where did
you get the idea for this film?
D: Its from the old song Avenues and alleyway. We heard it
in a car and we sid that this is such a great song we've got
to write a film around it. (Everyone laughs)Its true!
And then Ray says we've got to right a part where I can dress
as Elvis.
Ra: I just wanted to show up here and win the prize.
C: The boxing Rabbi?
Ra: Yeah.
They hand him the prize for 'most entertaining guest'
- a boxing glove puppet of a rabbi!
C: I have to say I've seen the film, it's excellent,
its out on April 12th. Best Film since Lock Stock and two
Smoking Barrels. And we have more guests!
3 other unnamed cast members come on. The set is now packed!
C: By the way, good luck with the Oscars Jude. We hope
you win. Good luck with the marriage Sean. Good look with
the drinking Rhys. And one person who ISN'T in the movie but
is also very good is Keith Chegwin (An 80's children's
presenter!!!)
ALL: HE'S JUST OUTSIDE!!
C: He's with you? Well bring him out!
More music - Keith emerges from a puff of smoke, mike
in hand to announce the
end of the show and Chris Evans worships at his feet and
the entire cast of Love, Honour and Obey start shouting "CHEGGERS
CHEGGERS"
END TITLES
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